Gong Xi Fa C.h.a.i.

Hello everyone, before saying anything else, just wanna take this opportunity to wish everyone a happy, healthy and prosperous Chinese New Year!!! Gong Xi, Gong Xi.

I am now blogging not from the comfort of my room as my phone line (cable) decided to give up on me one the eve of eve of CNY. *angered* And the shops are closed!!! I should consider getting wireless...

New Year Eve
This is one of the most dreadful days before CNY. Why? Its because of all the...

cOOking - this activity alone takes the whole freaking day and squeezes out every single drop of sweat out of your body!!! The cleaning up is dreadful as well. From next year onwards, will resort to doing steamboat everytime!!! muahahah!
cLeaNiNg - *faints* possibly will be cleaning every single speck of dust existing in the house as for the next 2 days, cleaning is prohibited *relieved*.
wasHiNg - today, the quantity of 'items' to be washed can be accumulated to a month of dinner utensils. *double faints*

I shall stop here as CNY is a time for celebration, and not complaining... *laughs*

CNY - day 1
Rude awakening due to endless.................sssss...............ssss....ss.s...... stream of fireworks.
However, driving towards my grandma's house, seems like the culture of 'balik kampung' is not really there anymore, even though there's a long shot of holidays ahead. Why do I have this particular type of thinking??? Because I was stuck in a jam!!! Even though its a short one, I really could not believe it, why is there so many vehicles during new year, you guys should have headed/ be heading home!!! I should have the lexury of driving comfortably and smoothly back home!!!

< to be continued as parents are rushing me liao >

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b.u.t. then...

I enjoy driving, I really do! I mean, what beats travelling around, enjoying the scenery (given there is any) breezing pass, having the car in your control whether to move ahead or to cruise along. Ahhhh, what better than having everything in your control and enjoying every minute of it.
But, that then, the paragraph denotes is applicable if and only if you're driving out of KL in locations WITHOUT traffic congestion!!! I fcuking hate driving in KL (minus holiday seasons)!!! I mean, even if an individual (moi for example) leaves the office at 8 something, still there's very bad congestion. Seriously, I dunno what's wrong?!?!? 8 plus at night, after all the initial private sector jam, government jam, school jam, everybody rush home for dinner jam... maybe I should name it as "Those who leave office late to avoid jam punya jam". Good name huh?
Sometimes, you just have no freaking idea what's wrong. One minute you're going on 20km/h, next thing you know, you're over the speed limit you're driving on par with the speed limit.
At times, in bad congestion, very bad... as though it is not bad enough, some featherbrains just have to make hell out of living for you (and all the other law abiding, handsomes and pretties citizen!!! Some of these idiots' contributions are:

1. Cutting Queues...
These are faggots that never learn the fact that in Malaysia, you have to QUEUE for EVERYTHING!!! Includes paying the government money, paying the government money and paying the government money!!! Pratically, the same concept applies when an individual is driving. When there's a traffic light, you queue BEHIND the car in front of you who is also waiting, not BESIDE, DIMWIT! Hey, everyone's rushing. I'm rushing home to watch Baywatch, how bout you???

Suggested Solution:
Install extendable sharp object on the left and right side of your vehicle. Once these non-queuers show up, upon activation, these sharp objects will extend and punture their vehicle tyres.
Possible outcome:
Illegal racers adds some excitement to their competition.

2. Emergency Lanes Abusers...
Classic get out of the jam quickly Arses. Anytime, anywhere you will be seeing these donkeys, using these lanes to supposingly escape the jam and causing more congestion. Usually, upon being caught, the standard lame answer would be :: "I'm rushing lar, got emergency because _______________ (fill in the blank). Omg, as if others are so free to get themselves stuck in the congestion. Hello?!?!? Are you still sleeping???
I just love it when I see drivers getting summonses for abusing these lanes. Nothing will make my morning better (Deem me evil, I dun care...muahahahahaha).

Suggested Solution:
Install extendable sharpnel strips that punctures all the cars abusing the lane; exception for emergency vehicles.
Possible outcome:
Booming business of tyre shops and mechanics and car towing services.

3. VIPs coming through...
I do not understand, why must they halt the whole traffic flow so that they can go faster? I am a Malaysian, he/she is a Malaysian. I pay tax, he/she pays tax as well. So, why the special treatment? If there are delegates from other countries for international events, understandable lar... but local ministers only mah. Jam with us lar, mebbe along the way, they can discuss rakyat issues with other drivers, which in turn benefits the government as they understand us better? Rakyat will know their leaders better too! Its a two-way benefit!

Suggested Solution:
Everyone should jam together, no VIP treatment.
Possible Outcome:
Making a better country together in the spirit of Malaysia Boleh!!! Kan Bagus???

4. And the worst of all will be :: Accident onlookers who are driving. I mean, drive, at most take a glance and move!!! Hey, if you're not planning to help, what the fuck are you slowing down for??? Taking a look at the misery of other people? Trying to get the plate number so that you can fucking buy 4D numbers?!?! Hey, slowing down impromptuly to get the number might end up getting yourself in the spotlight as well (as everyone is looking at the accident scene, who's looking front??? nyahaha).

Suggested Solution:
Use the mobile dividers (similar to some hospital which uses it to divide the beds) and surround the accident scene, so there will be 'nothing' to see...
Possible Outcome:
Nothing to see lar!!!

So, any other comments and suggestions?

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Points to ponder :: Do you realize that when taking a lift, most individuals tend to stare at the level indicator (the mechanism that indicates which level you are currently in) the whole journey up/down? If you station yourself at the opposite corner of the indicator, and take a good look at everyone, it looks as though they are waiting for some miracle to happen. If indeed something happens, I reckon everyone will go 'wwwaaaaahhhhhhh....' 0_o"

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m.i.s.s.i.n.g. ???

omGawd, I have not been blogging for the past few days! Looks as though I am the 'sun c hang'type of person (translation: erm, people that starts doing something but lacks the initiative to maintain it). Lookie, I explained a chinese proverb/saying; not so banana now eh? hyuk hyuk hyuk... Back to the topic, I deserve some spanking lecturing...

One of the main thing that kept me occupied (other than mmy endless flow of work, of course) will be ... Need For Speed: Most Wanted!!! Nyah haha! Was totally glued to it, freaking superb! Although the gameplay seems to have deteoritated, compared to Underground Series, storyline is fab while the graphics are absolutely [replace this with a word that represents extremely, fantabulously, out-of-the-worldly, realistically superb]! However, it does require some investment [$$$ - ka-ching] in terms of graphics and sound in order to fully maximize the gaming experience (no lar, I am not hao-lianing). Mine? Non-optiized yet, sigh~

Well, well, well, less than a week till the New Year (Chinese); good news is that, I get a week off! Woo Hoo! And I work in Selangor! Double Woo Hoo! To usher the new year, I decided do some highlight to my hair, just for the ong! The result? Looks kinda patchy though, :P. Decided to place pictures of Prosperity Burger (only sold once in a year during CNY in Malaysia) to usher the spirit of CNY celebration!!! yay!


Prosperity Burger...


McChicken Biasa...


McD Curly Fries, comes once in a year...

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gone b.o.n.k.e.r.s.

Nope, its not me. I am as healthy and energetic as any young men would be. Its my mobile (sounds of thunder, heavy rain and strong wind gushing around madly). It has turned against me after servicing me for close to 2 years; somehow I currently feel like there's some shocked individual out there gasp-ing loudly...
It is as though mobile (thus from this moment onwards, it shall be known as mobile) has gotten itself a new hobby, which is shutting down. At first, I thought it was merely battery problem but nowadays, even when the battery is full, it shuts down.

scenario 1:
macho me: yakitty yak yak (on mobile)
abcde: nayk nyok nyek (on the other side)
macho me: yak yak ... nan-da-yo?
*mobile shuts down...

scenario 2:
tik tak tik tak tik tak... sms 4 ... tak tak
macho me: nan-da-yo?
*mobile shuts down...

scenario 3:
pang pang, jiung jiung... (play game lor), boss level, forgot to save game...
macho me: abc fish crab curry dog cat wok #
*phone shuts down

Its kinda bad especially when you're on an important call, gives a really bad impression. so, anyone out there wanna sponsor me a new phone?

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Ex-housemate of mine sent me a link to an online game site; The Ultimate Businessman (yeap, sounds gay). Erm, a text and turn based game where you strive to be the bestest among the bestest. The best thing in this game is you can force bankruptcy onto other players (yeah baby); and so can they (oh no baby). So, if your good, your wealth goes up to gazzilions... hey, makes you feel good doesn't it?

Interested? please click here
Not interested? please click here

# in case you're wondering what this is, its my way of polite cursing...

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really? s.o. h.o.w.?.

Was on my way for jogging with munyee (yes, I exercise so please close your widely streched opened jaw and continue terrorizing reading) and she asked me:

munyee: Feeling some difficulties sitting in my car? (she's driving a kelisa btw)
me: Erm, not really, why this question?
munyee: Cos I see you kinda like struggling with your socks...
me: Still ok lar...
munyee: How do you feel ah, being quite big sized? I mean sometimes I see you walking, have to dodge around?
me: Oi, look in front, got car coming... aaaahahhhhhhhhh!!!!!

(*added the last part to spice up my blog, hahaha)
addtional info: munyee is cute, so I gave her pink for her dialogue

Well, what she mentioned actually got me thinking a bit. How do I feel being fat big in size, which applies every part of my body *ahem*... For those who have not any idea about me, I stood at about 1.84m, weights a freaking 86kg and flattens everything in front of me(further questions will not be entertained). To some, it might just be normal, ideal or optimum but for me, it does cause some fcuking problems hiccups.

Take for example, public transportation, buses for instance. The reason tall ones dislike the rear area of the bus is because it is elevated (which I suppose the engine is located there). Along with you-know-how-bus-drivers-in-KL-navigate, try to imagine someone whacking your head repeatedly. At least you can shout profanities at the person whacking you, but if you literally fuck curse the bus, next thing you know, you might be staring at 4 white walls in Tanjung Rambutan (Tanjung Rambutan = asylum for mentally disturbed individuals).

Imagine master yoda in the bus:
master yoda: Angry, you must not be, child. Dark side, it will lead you too...
super jed-i: Master, you are so small, you will not...
master yoda: Silence! you must! Mention that I am short, you must not.
super jed-i: But you are shhh....
master yoda: Angry I am now. *draws lightsabre, jumped on chair...
*bus driver swerves right...
master yoda: aaahhhh!!! *crashes out of window...
super jed-i: mmmmaaassssstttteeeerrrrrr.....

Another supposed to be helpful item in the bus will be the handles, supports, whatever... which will usually be at proportional to my face. Unless I or others hold on to them, it'll proceed to vent its anger on me. One may curse it silently, but be reminded that any form of negative noise directed at this non-living thing might result you in Tanjung Rambutan.
Or be like me, pen down all your disatisfaction, and creatively shout your blog address out at whatever nuisance directed at you. This way, people get to know about it and indirectly increases your visitors.


Blast em all, blast em all... muahahhaa, more space... mmmooooorrreeeee....

Next, buildings. Low ceiling buildings, bad. Low ceiling buildings with decorations, worst. I practically have to dodge everywhere I walk, which occasionally reminds me of bullets dodging scenes in Matrix. Maybe I should imitate those moves, on second thought, maybe not. Walking in complexes nowadays, one may realize that there's a growing trend of placing stalls wherever possible (also signs showing owners reaping more and more money). Being not particularly high, I once knocked on one of these things before and maaaannnnn... it yanks the brain out of me... As if not embarassing enough, the decorations have to fall off... *speechless*

And finally, the errand boy. I dunno what's with it but I seem to get all the chores; its not like I mind doing them, but sometimes it justs comes at the wrong place at the wrong time. On the bright side, maybe I look dependable (Yeah right!).

Albeit all the disasters mentioned above, I'm happy with myself (physically and mentally). I am lucky to be born healthy and complete. I am also grateful to be born into a caring and lovely family, being raised and exposed healthily, and experiencing life fully.

The ideal man bears the accidents of life with dignity and grace, making the best of circumstances.
-Aristotle


Happy and contented...

So, all in all, I gave her one final answer:
"Why should I pity myself when I can pity everyone else"... muhahahahahaha
Well, by this time, I have finished struggling with my socks...


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Saturday night's out was spent with a close bunch of my secondary pals, for a meal and unplanned after meal activity. smashpOp was there as well (mentioned because he's a blogger, not because I have some special relations with him and no other particular, funny, irrelavent reasons as well...). Somehow, photographing seems to be banned on this outing, so, no pictures lor... :(

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f.r.i.d.a.y.

Today Yesterday was F.r.i.d.a.y. the 13th (yes I know that you know that cause all the radio DJs has been desperately frantically trying to find out its origin so that they can scare the living shit out of you... *mebbe through goh-char calls...*

Hiss dot fm DJ: Hello, this is mr anderson from *tut*tut*tut* ... blah...b lah... can I speak to balh ... blah...
Never suspecting victim: speaking...
DJ: blah... blah... blah... (standard procedure to terrorize you...)
victim: trying the best to explain shit...
DJ: Since today is Friday the 13th, we will provide a walkaround if you imitate the sound of Jason hacking innocent people with a chainsaw...
victim: proceed with imitation... imitate Jason, imitate chainsaw, imitate ppl kena saw...
DJ: goh-char...

hhhmmm.....

morning:
the journey to work today was surprisingly smooth; usually, at this hour, I would routinely be cursing and swearing to the extend that Earth tilt away from its orbit. I am a gentle, kind and civilised guy hunk; but when it comes to congestion; no more mr. nice guy...

office hours:
It was a quiet evening, so quiet that something does not seem right. Out of a sudden, the bell rang and there stood a man at door-step, partially hidden by the sheer size of the 'item' he was holding. The gate was opened, fumbling his way through as he carefully placed down the 'item' and left. Females awed at it, males ignore it. The bouquet of flower stood unclaimed by the sofa.







(L - R)
sweet, gentle voice: Hi, I'm kinky Rosy, kinkiest of them all...
confident, strong voice: Hi, I'm flirty Lily/Tulip, flirtiest of them all...
deep, musky voice: Hi I'm... I'm... what the fark am I suppose to be ?!?!?! siao...

attention geniuses,
please tell me if you know what that is... it's green, soft, hairy, hollow and emits a strong aura that causes its victim to have a strong desire to pop them...

still office hours:
the emptiness still surround the office and once again, a figure stood by the doorstep. This one was holding a package, with unknown content; package was received and the experts attended it. Part by part the packaging was removed and in the end, everyone was drooling onto the cake.


Oh scrumptious cake, grant me the permission to bite upon you...

I have no freaking idea what cake is this, but basically it consists of:
Starts with layer of nuts - yummy!
1 layer of coffee spongy filling - yummy!
1 layer of cheese filling - yummy! yummy! yummy!
Another layer of coffee spongy filling - yumuek...
Ends with sioft crust + nuts - yummy!


night:
Basically, I dun go clubbing, I dun go binge drinking, I dun spend friday night at home... so, the next best thing in line will be 'yum char' session. As usual, the 'yum char' gang consists of me, munyee, ky and occasionaly catherine. This is due to the fact that Malaysia law dictates that any outdoor gathering consisting of more than 4 person will be considered illegal :P. We try our best to be applauded law abiding and co-operative citizens by keeping the gang small.

The lawful gathering was held at Steven's Corner Pandan Indah, and proceeded to a few rounds of pool after stuffing ourselves.


Kept myself occupied with the maggi goreng ayam = maggi fried chicken


roti kosong = empty bread, never look more kosong-ed


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Visit fooxion to indulge yourself in a huge variety of food ..... photograpshs... fooxion is a food community forum started by a few food enthusiats who find happiness in totally nothing else but food. There you will find food reviews, restaurant reviews and tons of hunks and chicks spreading food all over themselves to seduce you into the forum *okay, I made the last part out*.

warning...
Ensure you are well fed and ensure you do not enter with an empty stomach; just-in-case, place a napkin around you to prevent a saliva mess as you are guaranteed to drool endlessly...

shit... 0432 already, need to grab some doze before servicing my car tomorrow...

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s.h.o.p.p.i.n.g. I dun like

After constant infinite nagging by my dearest mummy, and my dearest companion, munyee,

* formal introduction of miss munyee into jedrantsagain.blogspot.com; she will be appearing frequently from now on, please welcome her with big claps ... *claps*claps*claps*

I finally got my lazy arse out to shop for new year clothes... I was more or less cheated by munyee to shop, we were planning just to have a simple meal in Kim Gary JJ, cos my dearest sister gave me a 15% discount voucher. However, a blardy queue prevented us from eating there, and we head for ramen instead. As usual, we should walk after meal to ease digestion and was somehow hypnotized to shop... I am beginning to wonder if I was set up, munyee being the mastermind behind all these.

I planned to wait until the very last minute (on the eve of CNY) to do my shopping... this is due to the fact that I believed in my simple proven theory:

"price of clothes decreases in relative with approaching festivities"

The story:
Last year, I bought my pants trousers about 3 weeks before CNY with 20% discount (in case any of you is wondering, yes, I shop for my clothes once a year. Unless I am in dire need of clothes or I see something irresistably irresistable, I will not spend on clothes!!!). 3 fateful days before CNY, I bumped across the same thing, in the same shop, same size and same colour with 40% discount; what the fcuk?!?!?! I felt cheated, I was devastated and I confronted the Sales Assistant (SA).

Evil SA: Hi, welcome to ABCXYZ.
Handsome Me: Hi, I actually bought a pair of these 3 weeks ago from here.
Evil SA: Anything wrong with it?
Handsome Me: You bet. It was on 20% discount (while pointing to the 40% discount tag and giving an innocent and puzzled look).
Evil SA: (Gives a sweet but evil smile) We're having a stock clearance sale currently.
Handsome Me: And previously?
Evil SA: That was the Chinese New Year sales. Would you like to get another pair?
Handsome Me: (what the ?!??!?!) Erm, no thanks. (smiles and leaves).

end of story.

In a record time of about 1 hour, I'm done with my shirts (should be pants as well if not for my oversized belly). I also realize that d largest waist size in most of d shops is 36 (yes, I know I'm farking fat, so what!). I was proud of myself, very proud, very very proud; grinned at munyee and boasted about how quick I am in getting my stuff. In retaliation, she wacked me. Ouch!
Oh, btw, I just llluuuurrrrrvvvvveeeeee discounts...





Well, got a Choc Frap + rhumba chips from Starbucks and headed home.

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u.n.k.n.o.w.n. talents...

I was actually planning to blog about my cousin's wedding but somehow stumbled upon something that totally sucked my brain away...

While I was browsing through kennysia's blog, I stumbled across an intriguing link (yes, I know everything in his blog intrigues his readers) but this has to be exceptionally different. Why? because I am the one who stumbled upon it... hahaha

Anyways, it leads me there ... and the next thing I know, I'm hooked; for heaven's sake, I know what your thinking out there and no, its not porn, its not fetish and its music...
Its one of the unknown local talented freelancers (am I using the correct term?) ... she's known as jasemaine and she offers a string of free pleasures (to your ears, ok?) to visitors.

Here's what I feel bout her music...
Lemme clarify that I do not have any background in music and is currently not involved in this industry, therefore all my rantings below should not be considered as professional opinion.

I personally find her music having a very localized feeling and focuses on vocal prowness... the lyrics ties strongly with the individual writing it, therefore during the delivering stages, it forms a very strong and expressive motion of flow... I personally like She and Never-ending story very much; this might be due to the amazingly shameful fact that I suck big time am not well-versed in mandarin. For me, she definitely rawks big time.

So, I would like to take this opportunity to wish her all the best in this industry. Nothing beats doing something you love the most and keep up the good work.
Anything else you wanna know bout her, get there and read it yourself...

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b.l.o.g.g.i.n.g again...

One of my new year resolutions is to blog again... stepping boldly once again to the unfamiliar world of communication, entertainment and criticism... (cheh wah) Wuz once a blogger on a different whatchamacallit (server/host) but then it upgraded and I lost feel to it... e.n.d. of s.t.o.r.y.

Lost in Blog world...

I actually planned to start blogging on da beginning of 2006, but then I got too wasted to even start up my PC, nevertheless registering a blog (haha?) I dunk like there's no tomorrow (dunker receives loud applauses) -> actions causes reaction, therefore: action - drink like there's no tomorrow reaction - puke like its puke day (annual puke event for drinkers, totally generated by my super highly energetic imaginative brain) Luckily I have a reliable bunch of buddies to take care of me... thanx guys... Well a lesson learnt here is that look at da freaking percentage before consuming alchohol...

Whoops... side-tracked... the thing that triggered my blogging bugs to re-activate is due to (plz, its definitely not peer pressure) my inevitable ranting impulse that keeps on buzzing around my mainly brain activity (lame excuse just to cover the fact that I missed blogging and also the fact that I'm pretty lazy... haha)

Well, guess I'm back...

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